What makes you "you"? Whatever it might be, learn to embrace it.
Take Pen to Paper: Edition 69
Greetings Pen to Paper readers,
We recently had our first snow.
This had me thinking about snowflakes.
“No human being is the same; we are like snowflakes, none of us are the same but we are all COOL.” -Pharrell Williams
In this newsletter:
How snowflakes and people are alike.
Our desire to belong
Embracing our uniqueness
Snowflakes and People
I recently watched this four-minute video about how snowflakes are formed. When you watch this video, you will understand why each snowflake is different.
The quote above is simplified.
In some ways, all people are the same. We all need the necessary biological components that make us viable living beings. Snowflakes need a bit of dust or pollen, water vapor, and the correct temperature.
And like snowflakes, we are each different. Our individual characteristics built on our biological components and unique journeys make us who we are. So, no two of us are alike.
One Characteristic of All People
Oddly enough, with all of our differences, we want to be like others so we feel like we belong.
We conform to gain acceptance by a group.
The feeling of belongingness is a natural desire. Abraham Maslow put social belonging as the third level of the motivation hierarchy.
We work hard to belong. We even tell ourselves what works for someone else will work for us. This is evident in our attempts at fad diets, exercise routines, the latest fashion, and the use of social media. If it works for others, it will work for me.
I’m on social media enough to be a victim to “follow Bob Fantastic or Suzy Superlative if you want to get better at (fill in the blank).” This is why I’m constantly subscribing to newsletters and then unsubscribing to newsletters.
It doesn’t help that our peer group, whoever that is, pressures us to follow along in order to belong to the group.
The writing cohort I belong to had me convinced I needed to create a product. The majority of the members are entrepreneurs who create as a means to monetize.
This is how I found myself writing an ebook and not enjoying it. I will finish it because I have too much done not to. My ebook will be free (just like this newsletter). I don’t plan to write another.
I would never make a good salesperson.
Embrace the differences that make you ‘you’
In our desire to belong, we forget we will not fit in the same box as everyone else because we are different. And worse, others treat us like we should fit into this box.
Individual characteristics and circumstances aren’t considered. We’ve each had a different journey.
When I was first prescribed medication for high blood pressure, the doctor prescribed the best. “It works for everyone.” Not me.
The second medication was “as effective as the first, with no side effects.” It gave me hives.
My doctor was putting me in a box.
I do that enough to myself!
We are all guilty of trying to fit in where we don’t and letting others influence us when they shouldn’t.
We need to take a lesson from two noted composers.
George Gershwin’s music spanned popular, jazz and classical music genres. He was a sensation in the musical worlds of theater, symphonic and instrumental classical composition, jazz, and opera. He even pulled inspiration from American folk music. Use the spirit of African-American music as inspiration for an opera? Gerschwin had no problem with that. His opera Porgy and Bess is now considered a classic.
Then there is Burt Bacharach. He was the master of the pop song. He didn’t mind his music being compared to easy listening because everyone was singing or wanted to sing it. What’s not to like about that? His music was criticized for not being able to dance to. But everyone was listening.
These musicians knew and embraced who they were. They were happy with the box they created for themselves.
Whether it’s our biology, life journey, or aspirations, our uniqueness defines us and helps us find (or create!) our box.
We need to honor our uniqueness by embracing it.
Be grateful for what makes you ‘you.’ Our uniqueness is a good thing.
“Always remember your voice is important and has more value than you could possibly imagine. You have a song in you no one else can sing.” - Charlie Mackesy
We need to listen to that voice.
7 Days, 7 Thoughts on Gratitude and Good:
As you can see from the picture above, the accumulation of snow was not much. ❄️
Now that you know a little more about snowflakes (or a lot, in my case), here are some close-up photos of snowflakes.
Listen to “Summertime” from Porgy & Bess, “Someone to Watch Over Me” and then settle into “Rhapsody in Blue” to capture the range of Gerschwin’s talent. 🎶
Of course, I must throw in my favorite Bacharach song, “This Guy’s in Love with You.” 🎺
I love the look of snow but don’t love driving in it. During my three years living in the Seattle area, I was grateful for my friend who volunteered to be the driver so we could carpool to school. 🚗
I am grateful for the continuous opportunities to learn more about myself. 🤔
In honor of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., here is a quote of his: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.” Each of us needs to be the light.
Thank you for reading. I hope this edition of Pen to Paper has inspired you to take action to learn something about what makes you “you.”
Smiles until next time,
💚
Susan
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Yes, Ame! We were always there for each other. And we had fun. Instead of small cliques, it always felt like one big family.
The most surprising thing I have found in nature is the day my Uncle Rueben took us for a ride in his small motorboat to get up close to an iceberg! It was near their home in Trinity Bay, Newfoundland. It was 1959 and I was five years old.