Hi Friends!
Have you thought about starting a new habit? Anyone can do it. I’ve done it many times.
The habit builder should not skimp on some necessary steps:
Research for information and or ask questions about your new habit
Obtain the necessary tools
Make it convenient, including time and place
Be consistent, daily is best
One new habit has eluded me. I finally found the solution. You guessed it. I was skimping. (There’s a back story to this.)
The solution? Revisit the steps.
The Back Story
For years, cross-stitch has been a hobby of mine.
I cross-stitched my first son a Christmas stocking. I only had one child. It was no problem finishing within a year. By his second Christmas, his stocking “was hung by the chimney” with care. (Christmas is only one element of this story.)
I chose a different pattern for my second son and started working on it after his first Christmas. This would be a piece of cake! I had done it once. I could do it again. Except I didn’t. His second Christmas rolled around, and the “Baby’s 1st Christmas” stocking was rehung by the chimney, even though it wasn’t his first.
His 3rd and 4th Christmas came and went. I had two boys to keep up with. We moved twice! On and off, I worked on the stocking. It became the family joke. We laughed about it.
Finally, one Christmas, two stockings hung by the chimney. My youngest son was eighteen! It took that long. When I looked at the two hanging side by side. I realized the second stocking had so much more stitching involved.
The Now Story - Fast forward eight years.
My first granddaughter was born. Of course, I’m going to cross-stitch a stocking.
I made my first mistake by choosing a pattern with A LOT of stitching like her uncle’s! ( I didn’t learn my lesson the first time.) In addition, the size count on the cloth is 18 squares per inch instead of 14 squares per inch. Due to my inattention to that small detail, my stitches went from very small to tiny!
These details didn’t occur to me until after I started working on the stocking. Not the best time to discover your obstacles.
The amount of stitching and cloth count could have been addressed by research and applying that knowledge.
I was not to be deterred.
I retired when my granddaughter was four. I worked on her stocking off and on. Now, I had the chance to make it a daily habit. I worked on it some the first year of retirement, but not nearly enough. There was a reason.
I struggled to see the tiny stitches. Santa’s white beard stitched on white cloth. Impossible!
I bought an inexpensive magnifier. It helped some, but my dream of a daily habit was far from real.
I reviewed my steps for creating a habit. I treated it like building my journaling habit. The project was conveniently at hand. Every night after dinner, I picked it up to work on it. I continued to struggle.
Finally, I broke down and asked the expert: my husband, the engineer.
“Why can’t I see the stitches? Do I need stronger magnification?”
The answer? A magnifier with a glass lens. His last statement, “You’re going to have to spend some money.” He knows me. And he knows magnifying lenses.
With my new, very necessary tool, I have a new habit. I won’t have the stocking finished by this Christmas. My granddaughter will be six. I hope* to have it finished by the time she is seven.
I have an added incentive. My second granddaughter will be two soon. Do you think she will notice if I buy a pattern for 14-count cloth with less stitching?
Habit building is not as easy as saying, “I’m starting a habit.” Some habits are easier than others.
If you want a habit, think through the steps. Set yourself up for success.
“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” - Confucius
7 Days, 7 Thoughts on Gratitude and Good
I am grateful for the ability to laugh at myself and let others laugh at my timeline in completing a project. 🧵
It took Michelangelo three years to sculpt David and four to paint the Sistine Chapel (with some assistance). 🎨 He also had someone to get his groceries, check out his grocery list.
Many great works of art have taken years to complete. Leonardo Da Vinci worked on The painting of the Mona Lisa for 16 years. I wonder if he had someone to get his groceries. 🍅
Some things are worth the time you put into their creation. Take a look at and read about this hand-painted video game. 🎮
It’s good to give to others. It can be your time or those possessions you no longer use. I’ve discovered I don’t mind giving away my small creations. They may brighten someone’s day.
*A quote from a much longer article on hope: “Hope is a motivational factor that helps initiate and sustain action toward long-term goals, including the flexible management of obstacles that get in the way of goal attainment. High-hope individuals can conceptualize their goals clearly; establishing goals based on their own previous performances. In this way, hopeful individuals have greater control over how they will pursue goals and are intrinsically motivated to find multiple pathways to successful goal attainment (Conti, 2000).” 🤞
Sometimes, inconvenience is good. It can make you finally take a step to make things better.
Thank you for reading!
Are you trying to create a new habit? Or maybe you have a long-term project. I would love to hear about it! Leave me a comment, I always respond.
If you know someone trying to build a habit, maybe the lesson I learned will help them. Share this post with them.
You know what I will be doing between now and next week. That’s right! I’ll be cross-stitching and writing my next newsletter to you.
Have a great week! Spend some time in gratitude and seek out some good.
❤
Susan
I have a suggestion. Send the work in progress stocking each year a week before Christmas. Just tie off any loose threads first. (I don’t cross-stitch. Is that an option?) When the season has passed, and the stockings are taken down, they get sent back to you so you can continue working on them. You can either start by stitching in the outline, or focus on one detailed area each year. Year one is Santa’s hat, year 2 is a cat on the bottom, etc. The kids will look at it and wonder what the full image will be. They will see their stockings evolve over the years, and it is a reminder to them that Grandma is thinking of them all year. That is a win-win scenario.
My oldest son gave me the book Atomic Habits by James Clear a couple of years ago. I will admit, I did a lot of contemplating about my habits as I read the book. I did try to use some of the advice, but I can't say I actually changed any of my habits. If anything, it made me feel guilty that I am such a weak person not to stick with a plan! 🤪 Now that I think about it, maybe I have honed my habits and I am a well oiled machine! Unfortunately, my husband would tell you a different story!
Your cross stitched stockings are beautiful, Susan! 😍